Bot Story:
    Book 1 – Nancy and the Ferrets

Chapter 5

Outside the three male ferrets had cleared off the picnic table and set it with a checkered tablecloth. Oil torches had been set on poles and Fizzy was lighting them just as the ladies appeared.

When Marley saw Sparkle appear with the cart, he scampered over to her to help. He guided the cart to a spot under a small tree near the table.

"Let's eat," Weasy sung out, as she and Nancy set the food down in the middle of the table. The sun was just slipping below the horizon and the western sky blazed orange and purple.

Marley and Sparkle started filling mugs and passing them to Fizzy who set them on the table. Nancy was fishing around in the pot with the tongs and was setting crawfish on plates while Weasy was dishing up the salad. They all sat down around the table.

For the next minute all that was heard was the sound of snapping shells, gnashing jaws, and "Yumms" all around.

"This tastes pretty good," exclaimed Marley, just before biting another piece of meat from the tail he held in his paw. "Yum, fabulous! I don't know which I like better, your cooking or my ale." He winked at Nancy, and then seemed to be studying her face, waiting for an answer.

"Your ale is mighty good." Said Nancy and she smiled back at him as she reached for her mug with her left hand and took a sip. "I guess he's not so bad after all," she thought.

"You could come live with us, become an honorary ferret." Marley's expression changed and he began to smirk. "I have room in my hammock, I could keep you warm on cold nights." He showed her his teeth, "and you know what they say about a ferret with big teeth." His smirk turned into a leer and he continued to stare at her.

Inwardly Nancy groaned. "Guess again," she thought.

"DOES THAT MEAN THEY BITE REAL HARD?" asked Sparkle, loud enough to get his attention. She gave him a big toothy grin just as he turned to look at her.

"Err," was all he could think of to say.

"YOU'VE HAD IT MARLEY, YOU'RE NEXT," laughed Fizzy.

This comment brought laughter from all the other ferrets except Marley. All he could manage was, "Ahh," and he did not look too comfortable.

"Thanks," whispered Nancy to Sparkle.

"My pleasure, believe me," said Sparkle. "Although, he does not taste as good as my Fizzy, or Mr. Mike." She wrinkled her nose.

Studying the crawdad on her plate Sparkle twisted off the slightly larger of the two claws, holding it in both paws. She licked her lips then sang out, "OH MARLEY..."

As he swiveled to look at her she winked at him them brought her teeth down around the shell of the claw. She half closed her eyes and bit down hard, the shell cracking and splintering loudly. She opened her eyes, and while never taking her eyes from his, she spit out a larger piece of shell onto her plate then bit off and swallowed a piece of meat. "UMMM, YUMMY!" She licked her lips.

Marley looked visibly shaken, he dropped his gaze to his plate and sat, not moving.

"Holy cow!" thought Nancy. "I'm glad I'm not a rodent or a bird with these carnivores around." She looked up and noticed that Mike had stopped chewing and was studying her.

"Penny for your thoughts?" was all he said.

"Oh, I was just thinking how glad I am that I'm not a rodent or a bird."

He chuckled. "Mouse problem? What mouse problem?" then he laughed.

"Except there never seem to be enough of them when you want one," Fizzy said. He winked at Mike.

"And we put out grain and water for them too," pouted Weasy. "They just steal it and hide."

"Ingrates," Mike said.

"Little fur thieves," suggested Fizzy.

"Hey, we resemble that remark," giggled Weasy. Then she solemnly added, "Thieving is an honorable profession."

"Piracy too," added Sparkle, warming up to the topic.

"We used to raise mice when my children were growing up," said Nancy.

"Where they tasty?" asked Mike.

"Did your children enjoy them?" asked Fizzy.

Nancy was shocked. "Oh no! We couldn't eat them they were our pets. Much too cute to eat."

"Well, they are cute, but what does cute have to do with anything?" asked Sparkle. "Humans are so weird," she thought to herself.

Nancy had finished the meat in the tail, and what edible pieces she could fish out of the body shell. She sat studying the claws and decided maybe Sparkle's approach was the most workable. She broke off a claw and then looked down her muzzle and remembered she had cow teeth. "I wonder how well they work on shells," she thought. She placed the shell well back in her jaw between her molars and discovered that the having a muzzle gave her extra leverage. She cracked the shell easily, removed it from her mouth, began picking off pieces of cracked shell with her fingers and popping pieces of the sweet meat into her mouth.

The conversation had died down and all where concentrating on eating. Nancy noticed that the ferrets had cleaned up their salad; some even taking seconds, but had only eaten the buttery part of the garlic bread leaving behind the crust and part of the softer middle. All had pretty much cleaned up the crawfish on their plates too. Like her, several of the ferrets had saved the claws for last.

Nancy looked down at her untouched salad, shrugged her shoulders and started eating it with her fingers, getting the sweet dressing all over her fingertips. "It's the ferret way I suppose," she thought to herself as she finished, licking her fingers one by one.

She took her third piece of bread and started mopping up the crawfish juice on her plate. Sparkle was watching.

"You like my bread?" Sparkle asked, smiling.

"Oh yes," answered Nancy. "You know us cows," she added, playing the part, "we love our grains." And she winked at Sparkle.

Sparkle beamed back.

Mike's head suddenly went up and he snapped around facing east.

Sparkle also went on alert, sniffing the air. "SCOTTY!" she squealed with delight, her tail bushed out and she jumped up from the table.

Fizzy and Marley also jumped up. All three started bouncing and dancing about. They danced their way toward the east end of the clearing.

"Ah the exuberance of youth," Mike said.

"I expect he'll want something to eat, added Weasy, she started to pile dirty plates on top of one another and set them on the corner of the table; then she got a clean plate.

Mike picked up the pile of dirty plates, "I'll just run these in." And he headed back toward the ferrets' hole.

"Is there something I can do?" Nancy asked Weasy.

"You sit hon, you're our guest."

Nancy turned to watch what would happen. Sparkle seemed the most excited, she was bouncing the most and chanting, "Scotty, Scotty, Scotty."

Scotty strode into the clearing. He was tall and thin with dark brown hair. He wore khaki cargo pants, a wild looking tie-dye t-shirt primarily of reds and yellows, a khaki vest, and hiking boots.

The three ferrets immediately surrounded him. Marley wrapped his arms around Scotty's waist, stepped up on his boots and pressed the side of his face against Scotty's stomach. Sparkle was clinging to his right hand with her paws, rubbing her face on his hand and saying, "Scotty, love you Scotty." Fizzy was pulling on his left arm and begging, "Lift me up, I want to be tall, lift me up."

Stiff legged; Scotty tried to walk forward, carrying Marley on the toes of his boots. Sparkle, dancing along at his side, licked his wrist then clamped her mouth over the bone, where the skin was the thinnest.

"Oh no you don't," Scotty said, but it was too late. She bit down hard, partly closing her eyes, a look of angelic bliss on her face. "OUCH! Sparkle, no!"

She scrunched up her nose and twisted her head back and forth.

"SPARKLE STOP," Scotty cried out. He pulled his left hand free from Fizzy's grasp and grabbed Sparkle's muzzle with it. "Sparkle, LET GO!" He tried to pry her mouth off his wrist.

"Owww, Scotty. You are hurting my nose." She said, as she let go of his wrist. She rubbed the sides of her muzzle with her paws. "You ruffled up my whiskers," she accused.

"Sparkle, I'm sorry, but look at my wrist." Red welts where starting to form where her teeth had slid over the skin. "My skin is not like ferret skin. You cannot bite me as hard as you can another ferret." He held his wrist out for her inspection.

"I'm sorry Scotty. Love you Scotty," she said. She took his hand in her two paws and started to rub her face on it again. "Love you Scotty." She licked his wrist, and then a gleam came to her eye.

"Oh no you don't," Scotty said, as he pulled his hand away.

"Aw, Scotty," Sparkle hopped up and down reaching for his hand. "Yummy, yummy, Scotty."

Scotty suddenly reached down with his right hand, leaning forward as he did so. He placed his palm on her tummy and spread his fingers. Bending his elbow he started to lift her off her feet, but she squealed and clasped his upper arm with her paws. The effect was that they both lost their balance and Scotty dropped to his left knee, throwing Marley completely off balance.

Marley let go and tumbled backwards. Then he scrambled to is feet and shouted, "Yaay, get her. Tickle her." He started dancing about.

Fizzy saw his chance and pounced on Scotty's left side. Digging the claws of his hind foot into the cargo pocket he scrambled up on Scotty's back, "Wee!" He shouted, "I'm tall, I'm tall." He wrapped his arms around the top of Scotty's head.

Scotty concentrated on Sparkle, tickling her tummy. Every time she would try to latch onto his upper arm or inside his elbow with her teeth, he would spin her around on her back, so that she could not get a grip. She was giggling and panting, trying to grab him with her mouth.

Scotty suddenly stopped tickling Sparkle and wobbled to his feet. Fizzy shifted position and tried to stand on his shoulders, finally getting one foot on each shoulder he sat down with his feet straddling Scotty's neck and gripped his hair with his paws. "I'm tall!" he exclaimed.

"Hey, hey. Be careful, I don't have a lot of that to spare," Scotty warned and reached up with his right hand to steady Fizzy. He walked toward the others waiting at the picnic table, Fizzy sitting on his shoulders.

Marley was laughing and pointing at Sparkle, "Ha, ha, ha, ha. He got you good." Marley was nearly doubled over.

Sparkle had rolled over and was starting to rise. "I'll get you good," and she sprung at him.

Even though Marley weighed nearly double that of Sparkle, she knocked him completely backwards. She landed on top of his chest and her mouth went to his shoulder.

"Ow, Sparkle," Marley yelled. He tried to roll first one way, then the other, and finally succeeded in flipping her. Now he had her down and tried to break her toothy grip on his shoulder.

"Eek," Sparkle cried, as Marley broke free. He was trying to bite at Sparkle now. She twisted this way and that to avoid his teeth, and tried to buck him off but he was just too heavy. He finally gave up on her shoulder and went for her side, succeeding in getting a good grip. "Owie, Marley, no." then she grabbed his ear and chomped down.

"SPARKLE!" Marley shrieked, and he tried to jump up. That was all the opening she needed. She let go of his ear and kicked out from under him and scampered just out of his reach. They were both panting hard, Marley grinned, and Sparkle giggled at him. "Hey fun, let's do that again," he said.

"Nooo!" and she was off like a shot, running for the picnic table.

Marley started after her, but his sash had come loose from around his middle and he dropped first one, then the other of his flintlock pistols. "Damn!" he cursed and stopped the pursuit to pick up his weapons.

Sparkle was standing on the far side of the picnic table, looking at Marley from between a seated Mike and Weasy. "No," she said. "You taste funny." She stuck out her tongue as far as she could and began wiping it down with her dirty paws. "Yuck! Dirty." She looked at her paws in horror, realizing what she had just done. Then grabbed the closest mug on the table and took a giant mouthful of ale. Some of it washed back into the mug, leaving a muddy swirl.

Scotty was at the table and was seated next to Nancy his back to the action; he was eating a crawdad, and trying not to laugh. Fizzy had abandoned his perch on Scotty's shoulders and was laughing at the sight of a chubby ferret loosing his sash and dropping things as he tried to run. Weasy was giggling and leaning on Mike, who was smirking. Nancy, turned halfway around, was a bit dumbfounded and tried to take it all in.

"What?" asked Marley. "What is so funny," he demanded.

"YOU ARE," said Sparkle loudly. "YOU TASTE FUNNY, TAKE A BATH."

Marley stopped half way to the table, he looked hurt, "But this is me. I don't wanna take a bath." He pouted.

"WELL YOU TASTE ICKY, I DON'T LIKE TO BITE WHEN YOU TASTE LIKE THAT."

"But all the girls..." started Marley.

"...DON'T LIKE THE TASTE OF ICKY FERRET," finished Sparkle.

Marley pouted even more, but did not move. Fizzy walked over toward him and tapped his own lips. Marley looked expectantly at Fizzy's face, studying it.

"Let's go for a little walk Marley," Fizzy said calmly. "Maybe we can catch some mice or something."

Marley nodded, still studying Fizzy's face.

"Let's try over by The Center," Fizzy offered. Marley turned and marched north. Fizzy waved at the group and then followed Marley.

"Wow," said Nancy. "What was that all about?"

Scotty shrugged; he swallowed a mouthful of crawdad. "Hormones or something." He did not want to give a full explanation in front of the other ferrets.

"And the biting, what is with all the biting?"

"When you're a ferret," Scotty began, "you always bite the one you love. That's normal." He looked at the welts on his wrist; some had thin lines of dried blood. "Of course it helps to be a ferret too," he mumbled. Then a little louder, "It is their way. Fun and games and biting and... Say, where's the music?"

"Oh, music," said Sparkle. "Come Nancy, you can help with the music." She came around to Nancy's side of the table and began to pull at her hand, but Nancy recoiled and pulled her hand back, looking at it.

"Oh, sorry," said Sparkle. "I don't bite girls much. Girls taste alright, but boys taste so yummy." She grinned. "I won't bite you, okay?"

Nancy offered her hand as she got up. Sparkle led Nancy over to a small gazebo near the garden. In its center was a four-foot high red boxy device, decorated in chrome and glass. Nancy read the chrome script on the front, "Cyber Juke 2000".

Sparkle climbed up on a wooden step in front of the jukebox. "You just flip these," Sparkle was saying, "to find the songs. Then you push these buttons." She demonstrated. "Now you do one."

Nancy looked through the song selection, "Oh, The Beatles, Hard Day's Night." She made her selection.

"Now I do one," and Sparkle made another selection.

Weasy had gotten up from the table and wandered over to the jukebox, "May I? She asked.

"Sure," said Sparkle.

Weasy made the next selection. "Now you do one," she said, turning to Nancy.

Scotty leaned toward Mr. Mike. "So," he asked, "what happened today?"

Mike scooted around to Scotty's side of the table, speaking low into his left ear.

Music started to play, Sparkle and Weasy started to dance, whirling around. Nancy studied their steps for about half a minute, then joined in. The first song was about to end as Fizzy and Marley returned, swaying with the beat of the music as they came. "Hi Fizzy, hi Marley," called out Sparkle, the old disagreement seemingly forgotten.

"We heard the music," stated Fizzy.

The tune changed and the beat picked up. The four ferrets and cowgirl started dancing in earnest.

Scotty's tablet computer chirped from the holster on his belt, he picked it up and looked at the screen, a telegram. He taped the screen with his stylus and after a few moments announced, "Incoming, we have faeries!" He quickly slid off the bench and stood up, facing a clear area.

<end of chapter 5>